No, wait. This month the Microsoft Scripting Guys are brushing up on their World Series trivia...
Hold on, what's this about meat hooks?
Sorry, that can't be right....
Actually, in this issue of TechNet Magazine the Scripting Guys are using, well, scripts to pry the identity out of some local and remote systems.
Thrill to the manipulation of a little-known (but extremely useful) ADSI object named ADSystemInfo.
Experience the excitement of the WMI?class?Win32_ComputerSystem and the UserName property.
Wonder at querying samAccountNames from Active Directory via the GetOwner method.
Really, it's more interesting than it sounds.
Just be sure you're ready when someone asks you, "Who won the 1903 World Series?"