[Funnies] How do You Handle Stress?


seankSome creative ways of dealing with stressful situations. Now "Miss Manners" says that walking about the office with a small pry bar and a loaded AK-47 is not the best way to handle stress or stressful situations. And truthfully so.  It only ends up in hurt feelings (and fingers). But these situations need to be dealt with.   On a more human and proper manner.    Letting the 'ID' out of the box is never the best way to go about doing it.  So answer the following questions, add up your total and the end and let us know how you handle stress!

 

 

 

 

Situation

A customer has returned with a faulty piece of merchandise, they are angry.  Do you....

a) Contact the manager and work with the customer to expedite the issue in a courteous and professional manner.

b) Question their motives and examine the item for obvious damage caused by the customer

co) Bring about questions regarding their parentage and throw the item back at them.   After wards you call in the police for the apparent (but false) death threat  uttered by the customer.

Situation

Your very expensive Video machine from a Major Corporation has failed.  Do you.

a) Contact customer support, work with them and have the problem resolved as best as can be.

be) Yell, scream, cry and whine like a little baby to get your way.

co) Trace the phone number and determine the final destination.   You then get a plane ticket to that destination.    You smash through the front door to determine a new orifice to deposit the faulty hardware in.

Situation

You are driving in traffic.   You have just been cut off.   Do you.

a) Be dismayed by the apparent lack of manners in the driver and brush it off as that.

be) Flip them "the bird" and offer some creative "critique" on their driving style.

c) GUN THE ENGINE AND CHASE THAT MOTHER DOWN!

Situation

You have gone to a store to pick up an item that is one special.   You discover upon arrival the last one has been sold out.   Do you.

a) Chat with the floor manager to see if an equitable alternative item could be arranged for or possibly place the original on backorder.

b) Spit on the floor, invent some "magic phrases" and start having a "hissy fit".

c) Grab the most expensive item on the floor and proceed to walk out the door (without paying) and classify it as "just compensation", then turn about and chuck it into the parking, preferably hitting a very expensive car belonging to the owner.

Situation

You have just completed a job interview.   Upon the finalization you find the job was handed to somebody inside the company.   Do you.

a) Discuss with the hiring manager to see if there might be something available still, possibly in a lower position.

b) Suggest that everybody working there is only there because they are really good at "kissing butt"

c) Call in a false bomb scare on the hottest day just to get a rise out of them.  Then call in an anonymous call to the FBI tipping it off as the hiring manager who placed the false call.

 

 

Simple scoring system.

1 point for each (a) answer
2 points for each (b) answer
3 points for each (c) answer

0 - 4 You are cheating.   You can't have gotten that score.   So you automatically get a 15!   Get off this rock right now.

5  You are a peaceful member of society.   We probably will find you kissing baby pigeons and petting geese.  Yuck!

6 - 9 Well you probably won't get in TOO many fights but knowing how to run probably wouldn't hurt.

9 - 12 Let's just say you might have some "issues" and should probably get some help.  But I didn't say that.  It was that other guy down the road.   Yeah him.  You chase him and I'll hold him down.  Right?  Right?  Just you and me bud right?

12 - 15 How can I put this delicately?   What way would be politically correct and polite?  Never mind there is none.  You are out of your gourd and should go find a nice safe dumpster to live in.   You shouldn't be around anything more irritating than "Jell-O" and no more personality than a carton of milk.  Let's just leave it at that.


Comments (1)

  1. ye110wbeard says:

    How Ironic is thy timing… 🙂

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